Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
