Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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