Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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