yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
