We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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