I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
