How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
