If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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