SEEEEXXX PLEASE
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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