Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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