You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Still dying that you shit outside
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize