I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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