Me too!
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
