She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize