Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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