Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
