so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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