It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
