she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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