I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize