It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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