You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
