Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize