I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
