Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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