I think im going to throw up on grandma
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
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