Can Purell be used as lube?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
