Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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