She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
