yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
