He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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