There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
