Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
