How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
