this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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