He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
