I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
