Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
