There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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