This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
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