she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
