my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
