I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
