So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
