some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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