After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize