Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
