in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize