I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
