I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
